Need Some Time To Refocus and Replenish? 5 ways to put yourself first

Article By Amber Bennett // EEW Magazine Online // Self-care

No one can be selfless all the time. Jesus even had moments when He pulled away from the crowd to be alone, refresh, and replenish through prayer – and He is the son of God!

If Jesus, who was part human, part deity, needed to put Himself first sometimes, then sis, you, being 100 percent human, certainly need to do the same!

If you don’t know how to put yourself first and give yourself much-needed time to refocus and restore, you’re not alone.

The do-it-all and be-there-for-everybody-and-their-mama types are everywhere. Get in line, and take a number. And while you’re at it, grab these 5 tips from EEW Magazine Online to help a sister out.

#1 Say it. Come on and cough it out; tell folks you need space! It would be nice if people could read your mind, know when you’ve had enough, and give you room as a courtesy. But you already know that’s not happening. If you need space and personal time, that message is not going to be transmitted telepathically. You must say it. It’s not rude to say, “I need some time alone.” If you have little ones, this can be a bit more complicated. When they are down for a nap or engaged in an activity that keeps them out of your hair for a moment, use that time for you.

#2 Set firm boundaries. You can’t be jelly-backed if you’re going to protect and defend your space. Now if you’ve got the “please everybody spirit” on you, honey, this is going to be impossible. Setting boundaries means placing clear limits on what you will and will not do and what you will and will not allow others to do. Draw a line in the sand, and don’t overcommit and say yes with your mouth, when your heart is really saying no.

#3 Honor your priorities. What is important to you? You’re the only person who can decide that. But once you know what matters most, put those things in order from highest to lowest priority, and invest your time, energy and resources accordingly. Just a little hint: If the first three items on your priority list don’t include you, do better. Change the order of things. Because if you’re not taking care of you, you’re not going to be any good to anybody else.

#4 Do what makes you feel good. What brings you joy and makes you feel refreshed? What relaxes you and helps you de-stress? Working out? A hot bath or shower? Reading a devotion? Lighting candles? Having a cup of chai tea in the morning? Watching a sermon? Listening to a podcast? Journaling? Chile, just do it. Add something to each day that makes you smile and puts a spring in your step. You are definitely worth it.

#5 Get rest. Resting doesn’t just mean getting ample sleep (though that is very important!). It also means having moments to unwind and decompress. You need quiet time, which means you can’t give yourself away all day, every day without carving out private, uninterrupted moments. Steal away. Lock yourself in the bathroom if you must! But do what is necessary to be alone and check in with yourself.

If you apply these helpful tips, you’ll feel better and function better, too. If you don’t apply these strategies, you may very well stay in an endless cycle of exhaustion, over-commitment and self-inflicted misery.

What will you choose?


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